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I purchased my own book today.

I was a little nervous that the book wouldn't be available in the local Barnes & Noble that I went into. Did the chain buy copies of it? I thought about searching various sections (Self-help, African-American, music) for it, but in order to cut through my own angst, I went straight to customer service.

"I'm looking for a copy of THE MESSAGE," I told the friendly-faced Barnes & Noble employee.

"Oh, THE MESSAGE, like the bible?" she asked.

"No, it's about hip-hop," I replied with a slight laugh.

"Oh, completely different," she joked.

She punched a few keys and the book popped up. She recited the title and my name as the author.

"It just arrived yesterday," she said. Then she left and went to the back of the store.

I waited and wondered if I should identify myself as the author. But I didn't want to. All I wanted to do was buy the book.

Tomorrow, the 25^th, is the official release day for the book. I was thinking of a way to describe the feeling. At first I thought about being eight again and it being Christmas Eve. But that's not quite accurate. I was never nervous on Christmas Eve, except that one year when I didn't think my behavior warranted both the bike and Nintendo system I desired.

I feel more like tomorrow is the first day at a new school. I'm excited to show off a little, eager to meet new people, but nervous, because I hope they'll like me. And I also know that I'm about to embark on a year full of assignments and homework. I want to make sure I bring home grades that will make my family proud. Yeah, tomorrow is the first day at a new school.

And today, I'm buying the main school supply I'll need.

The B&N customer service rep came back with my book in her hand. She told me she thought it would be a bigger size. It's a small trim size, like THE SECRET. Almost pocket-sized.

I smiled and headed toward the cashier. She rang it up normally. Bu to me the purchase was fair from ordinary.

It came to $16.75. I invested in my future.

Then I walked out of the store with my book inside the green Barnes & Noble bag.

I think I will do this a few more times at different bookstores.

And I'll be going back to my local B&N (probably this weekend) and this time I will identify myself, chat with the manager, make friends, and hopefully sign copies.

But today, I was just happy to buy my own book.

The hustle continues...